High Strangeness: Getting My MUFON Shit Together

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Getting My MUFON Shit Together

MUFON sure has a funny way of making a body feel welcome.

Three days ago I received word that I had passed the MUFON Certified UFO Field Investigator Examination with a score of 90. But then I read that I still needed more training before I could begin investigating UFO sightings and crashes and abductions. Then I read that they had sent me an instruction manual for the MUFON Case Management System (CMS). I opened the document only to find that I can't start my CMS training until I receive my special Certified UFO Field Investigator Username and Password. Then I read that my State MUFON Director would be contacting me with my Certified UFO Field Investigator Username and Password for accessing the CMS. But here's the thing: it's been three days and I haven't heard boo from my State Director.

Is she hesitating because she can't think of a cool enough Username for me? My daughter Cxxxx and I discussed it this morning and decided that Robot Warlock would be the coolest Username ever. So I'm going to write to my State Director and suggest that she name me Robot Warlock and get on with it, already.

Also, I have to send a 3" x 2" head shot of myself to MUFON International HQ for my photo ID badge, but that's tricky too. What photo do I send? What emotions do I want to stir within the heart of a UFO witness when I flash my ID badge at him or her? Reassurance? Suspicion? Trust? Confusion? Fear?

I'm going with Reassurance:

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